A hybrid work of experimental fiction, dumb young-adult paranormal romance, and coming-of-age realism, Teen Sex Tragedy is a comedy-horror novel about the adolescent terror of remaining a virgin forever.

In central New Jersey, boy meets girl, but just barely. The girl is Catherine, a beautiful seventeen-year-old witch whose growing powers unleash mayhem upon the affluent, orderly suburb where she lives; the boy is Jeff, a neurotic twelfth-grader whose anxieties are exacerbated as the other misfits and undesirables of his class begin to vanish, one by one, in what suggests a series of virgin sacrifices.

For Jeff, teenage life is already confusing, but when, for reasons unknown to him, he becomes a particular target for Catherine's experiments in necromancy, he loses his bearings completely, and his struggle to regain them--amid botched dates, failed driving tests, and looming college applications--is complicated by his growing admiration for Catherine, evil or not.

Is there any hope for Jeff--or, for that matter, any of us, even without the interference of a malicious sorceress? Was the 2005 blockbuster novel Twilight truly as awful as all the smart people said it was? What if senior year never really ends?